faith

"Faith turns walls of opposition into steps toward God's destiny for us."

Today I had the opportunity to become upset, worried, and greatly discouraged. However, something reminded me to rise above and trust that God can and will work this out for my good. When faced with a financial dilemma, I find it important to remember that we cannot serve both God and money. I can either become greatly discouraged by looking at the financial hole, or ask the Lord what to do. In asking the Lord what to do in today's situation, He just told me to be quiet and love the other person involved. I did just that, and ended up making twice as much money as I originally intended.

Matthew 6:24-27

"Don't be afraid your life will end; be afraid that it will never begin."

--Grace Hansen,
American dance director

lift

He lifts my head when I cannot. He restores my joy when I have lost it. He is faithful to complete the work He has started in my heart and family, even when I take a hiatus from being faithful. He does universe sized miracles with my mustard seeds. He has more than enough power to bring the dead to life. He is the author and finisher of all that is wonderful in my life. My worries and fears do not influence His love for me. He guides me when I cannot see, He carries me when I cannot walk, He gently warms my hardened heart, He breathes life in response to my words of death. Who is this guy?

"Life is known only by those who have found a way to be comfortable with change and the unknown. Given the nature of life, there may be no security, but only adventure."
--Rachel Naomi Remen,American physician and professor

Courage to take risks that bring hope to others

"You cannot cross the ocean, until you have the courage to lose sight of the shore."

- Christopher Columbus

author and finisher

last week I had an amazing miracle happen, that is important to document. God has recently been teaching how be sure that I am "resting" in Him. So that my business decisions and personal life flow within his place of provision.

One aspect of this is that He is the author (or initiator) of ideas and/or direction. So 1 week ago on monday I sat in this very same coffee shop contemplating if my idea for the next day was in fact authored by God, or be me. We (VisionAir) had an opportunity to fly to the midwest using a clients plane to provide free air transportation to people needing medical care in other cities. I sent an email to our friends that Pastor in Tulsa and asked if they would be interested in helping with the operational costs associated wit the trip. They said yes, but with no guarantees. So After praying, we agreed to take the risk and believe God to come through. This was the worst possible time to ask this church for help as well as the worst possible time for VisionAir to take a financial risk, but we knew in our hearts it was authored in heaven, so off we went. in three days we moved 12 yr old Jacob and his mom for Cleft lip and palet treatment (Tulsa-Houston) we moved Bobby who is dying from pancreatic and liver cancer (Waco, TX - Tulsa.) The next Day we moved Jeff and his wife from Little Rock, AK to Houston for Lung Cancer treatment, he has only one lung and was in bad shape. Then finally we were able bring 10 yr old Skyler and his family from East Texas (Longview) to Denver for life saving spine surgery. God came through his people that go to Destiny Church in Tulsa. they gave more than enough to cover the operating cost of the entire trip. The whole trip was a testimony to the goodness and provision of Papa God. Even how the schedule came together to move everyone was a logistical miracle.

When God trusts us enough to experience a supernatural event, we must realize that we then have a expectation put on us by our loving Father to believe for more of the same. We are not to endeavor to replicate or deduce the experience to a formula. We are, however expected to function at a new level of Faith so that our family as well as those that we have the opportunity to influence will come into contact with God's supernatural love. He is after all called the God of the Impossible. Therefore, spiritual growth happens when we accomplish something "impossible" with Him. No matter if it is simple Bible reading, prayer, or participating in church. The purpose of the connections with God is to lead us into a tangible experience. Knowledge of God is not enough in and of itself, and ind act can be destructive. It is meant to lead us into an encounter with the creator, the author, the finisher of all that is GOOD. So please be sure to Come to Him, learn of Him, REST in Him, so that He may author and finish the great work that He has already started in you. He really can take care of you in such an impossible way that He will simultaneously also change the lives of others through your steps of obedience.

Yah God!! Moved 4 families 5,000 miles, at no cost to them. Trip cost $5,000. all the money came in, and lives were changed. Bring the Kingdom, and stop trying to do it on your own.

Friends

Friendship improves happiness, and abates misery, by doubling our joy, and dividing our grief." --Joseph Addison, British writer and politician

Leading with the Right Heart

Luke 15

The Elder brother said to his father "you killed the fattened calf for him but you haven't even given me a goat." To which his dad responded "I killed the fattened calf for him, but you own the farm."

One of the primary problems in leadership today is that many people in positions of authority have the mentality of the elder brother instead of the father. Instead of knowing their role (of who they truly are) as a father (or mentor) of others, they believe lies. They believe lies about themselves, their brothers, and their father that breeds insecurity and competition. They consequently are in competition with the very people that they are suppose to be leading and constantly feel the need to reinforce the power they have over them instead of simply empowering them.

If we do not solve the identity problem in leadership then we will inadvertently build an infrastructure that keeps people from fulfilling their potential. One of the saddest things to see is an organization that has become so good at building this structure to enable or cope with the identity issue that they have no idea that anything is wrong.

4 rules of marriage: RULE #1

I have recently been confronted with the realization that some of our friends have been struggling in their marriages. In the past 6 months there have been multiple couples that we know and love that have had something really BIG (Big in a bad way) happen in their relationship. The truth is the BIG news did not start that way, there was a breakdown in one of the 4 rules. I have shared this list over many cups of coffee in the past few months, so here it is. There are other things we do that enhance our relationship, and I'm sure others will have wonderful other ideas to add, but may I suggest that these are the 4 RULES that give us a firm foundation on which we can continue to build on over our lifetimes.

Our 4 rules of marriage. Rule #1

1. DATE! At a minimum of two times per month. In case you need clarification by "Go on a Date" it means go out (just the two of you) without kids, or anyone else and do something together, or just sit and talk.

No excuses, here are the reasons people tell me they do not date and here are my answers, enjoy.

Excuse #1: We do not have time

Answer #1: Make Time! If your Spouse is not important enough to do it, your marriage IS deteriorating.

Excuse #2: We do not have the money

Answer#2: You can go on a date for free. Walk around the mall, the park, the airport (oh sorry that one just applies to me.) We have saved our change to go get ice cream before and are not afraid to do it again! Sharing 1 Ice cream helps the budget and portion control.

Excuse #3: We do not have anyone to watch the kids

Answer #3: Find a few options that you both feel comfortable with. Trade date nights with a few trusted friends (it will then be free) Join a Gym together: then workout together and leave time to just talk before picking up the kids from childcare. Note: If your partner does not feel good about the child arrangements, they are not free to focus on you.

Excuse #4: We like to go out with other couples and friends together

Answer#4: It is totally OK to do that, but refer to the definition of a date. I have had couples that are young (newly married) and couples that are more mature:) (Been married "FOREVER") tell me they prefer to go out in groups. What they usually are not saying is... we do not have fun or enjoy being together alone. This is BAD NEWS Folks! Date at least two times per month until you start to enjoy it, it may take several months of dating to get all the "tough" conversations out of the way, then you will start to have fun again as long as you live by the other 3 rules as well.

Excuse #5: I am just Too Tired

Manage your Energy and emotions so that you have more to give on your date. What is it that is draining you? Usually it is their job, so I will ask about their job and find out almost always it is one of the following...

1. Work Excessively long hours at office and/or at home

~ Set healthy boundaries

2. Have job they have no passion/gifting for

~ This is a big one, but hire a coach to help you find those out and start moving in the right direction toward what you are good at.

3. Cannot say NO to the Boss or co-workers

~ Learn to say NO the right way. Remember if you can't say NO to them when it is appropriate, you ARE saying NO to your family.

4. Transition, pressure, responsibility at work

~ The more intense the circumstances, the more you need to focus on each other. If your office closes, make sure your marriage doesn't close. If you lose your house, do not lose your wife. The good news is, when they take that car you should have never financed, you posses a relationship that has the capacity to fulfill you so much more than the silly car.

Excuse #6 I will do it after I get a few things in order (close this deal, get a promotion, get the basement finished, re-landscape, etc)

Answer #6 This is a trap, we all know it. Guess what, your partner knows it too! There is always something and usually that "something" takes eons longer than we think or have been told. These are rules, and rules do not have exceptions or exclusions.

Excuse #7 We Feel we should focus on the kids right now

Answer #7 This is called a child based marriage. It is not biblical nor is it healthy for the kids. What they need (albeit among other things) is for you to love each other by example, and teach them (by your dating example) that your relationship matters. You need time to focus on each other. You duplicate who you are. Little girls learn how they should be treated by how daddy treats mommy. Do you want your little girl to marry someone that doesn't think its important to take them out like a princess? Little boys learn how to treat girls from the way mommy treats daddy. Do you want them to learn that you really never have time for each other? If the kids get ALL the time away from work, then the idea of marriage to them will be a means to an end (raising kids.) And you are setting them up to have the same type of marriage.

There it is rule #1. I care about you, and know that the amount of fulfillment and the heights of your dreams and that of your kids largely depends on the condition of your marriage.

The following pics were taken on 2 different dates. one to show the cost of our really yummy food and drink shared during happy hour. See Amanda's blog for info. The other is Amanda's mouth (doesn't she have nice teeth?) holding a sign at Michael's (the craft store) I scored major points for going there with her on our date because she KNOWS, I would rather snort table salt.

It is what you read when you don’t have to that determines what you will be when you can’t help it.”

—Oscar Wilde

freedom

"When you are living in the consciousness of Jesus and His finished work you will not have a continual, perpetual, propensity to sin. If you are living in habitual sin the key to your freedom is a revelation of what Jesus has done for you on the cross."

a person who lives in grace instead of the law becomes obsessed with God! The biggest problem of living under the law and the guilt and condemnation it brings is that we become obsessed with ourselves. The law points to our performance and therefore creates an intense inward focus. You should be obsessed with God and HIS performance.

Galatians 2:20

Romans 7:1-4 The key to fruitfulness in our lives is to understand that we have died and that is why I can now live!.

I have been crucified with Christ. It is a declaration of my legal right to the abundant life the scripture teaches. When you look at the cross, heaven sees that you have died there.

John 10:10 Jesus came so tht we can have the abundant life!

stand with others

Today I have been listening to a few leadership teachings by one of my mentors John Maxwell. I also had a long conversation with a friend who is in a very difficult leadership position. Now as my mind reels from all that I learned today and all that I discussed with my friend I try to slow it down as I sit in a certain caffeinated building with green accents. I am reminded by the Holy Spirit as to what really matters for me. It is to love my wife, to Father our kids, and...

To stand with others that stand for something worth standing for. I almost had some tears as I thought about my friend. I hope that I encouraged him, and added value to him. I do get frustrated with myself sometimes on days like this because it reminds me of who I am, and shows me the disconnect between who I am and how much time I spend doing tasks that do not reflect who God has called me to be. Pappa God, continue to reveal your kingdom, your thoughts, your desires, and your treasures to me. I long to lift others so that they may see more and do more for your kingdom.

Perhaps I am a cheerleader as well as a coach?

book #1

since Pappa God has put musings of an author on my heart for some time now, I am both grateful and excited to say that I believe we not have a catylistic idea that will bring together the first book.

It ill be titled

"TRE"

(keys to an amazing life from your loving Pappa)

I am now wrestling with ideas that will become the KEYS contained in the book

here are the random ideas from my piece of paper...

lead yourself, attitude, believe, forgive, direction, obey, openness, friends, rest, character, fun (balance)

It will have lots of stories from your Pappa's life that you can learn from, stand on, and reach higher than I have. I will keep organizing these thoughts in Pappa God's presence over the next month and then begin the fun journey of Pappa God speaking through me, to you!

How to be a son

Luke 15:11-31

It is the infamous story that we call "Prodigal Son." The Bible says there was a man with two sons. One of them goes to His Dad and asks him for his share of the inheritance and skips town going on a rampage doing all he can to ruin his life. He comes to his senses and thinks that he is no longer worthy to be his Dad's son and decides instead to be one of his servants. I have done this in my life after being a rebellious teenager, I realized how GOOD my Papa God is and I returned to him, and was welcomed back with a party of God's unmerited favor and enjoyed a season of wonderful time in His presence, were he spoke to me and through me in mighty ways, all in spite of me and not because of me.

At some point as I learned more of the things of God, I eventually became the OTHER brother! It was very subtle but my value or identity slowly became in what I was doing for God and what I was not doing that was bad, anymore. Now looking back on even a few years ago, when I was the Youth Pastor at The Rock, I was fault finding and critical of the humanity in other leaders, because they had not "Earned" what I had earned. I am now discovering God's increasing pleasure in being with me as I relinquish the false notion that I need to have a position or opinion about those around me. Am I Angry because my Papa is Good? (See Matthew 20) I live as His son, and all that is His is mine. It is not earned with my daily tasks, in fact they are not my daily tasks at all! I am working in His fields. The disconnect from the principal of Heaven that this brother was experiencing I have also experienced. His focus was on being diligent to earn the affections of His Father. His drive is that one day, it will all be his. Humanity is driven to please others in order to get something from them (money, advice, time, approval, friendship.) Yet the kingdom of God does NOT operate this way. Our father is not going to pass away. It will never become solely ours! Yet, many of us treat our relationship with Papa this way and are trying to get something from Him that He has already given us. Thinking that if we do a good job He will answer more of our prayers, give us a promotion at work, or bless our efforts that He never authored in the first place. His ways are not our ways, His thought are NOT our thoughts.... they are ALWAYS better.

³¹“His father said to him, ‘Look, dear son, you and I are veryclose, and everything I have is yours. ³²We had to celebrate this happy day. For your brother was dead and has come back to life!He was lost, but now he is found!’”

emerging leaders

Lou,

For some reason (perhaps the Holy Spirit) I keep recalling the conversation you and I had at Coffee in Ken Caryl several months ago. You asked me the question "What percentage of time do you think a leader should spend on his/her gifts on a weekly basis?" I gave you the John Maxwell answer of 80% on gifts and 20% on weaknesses, but then you gave me context.

You were referring to 2 young leaders on staff at your church that you wanted to help mentor as leaders and managers. I do not remember the specifics but I wanted to share 2 keys to maximizing leadership potential.

Skills a Leader MUST have.

Theses are skills a leader who oversees anything must be good at and strive to improve. It does not matter what an individual's gifts are or are not, these skills are necessary for anyone that is directly responsible for a group of people and there cumulative score will directly relate to there effectiveness in getting the job done.

A. See The Big Picture: Do they think outside of their direct responsibilities, and see how there part affects the whole organization? Leaders who are very good at seeing the big picture develop departments at add value to other departments and therefore improve the entire organization.

B. Self-Motivation: Do they not only create a clear vision for there team, but go the extra mile to initiate? Can you say the word and the job is done, or do they need babysitting until a task is complete. One great test of leaders is when someone gives them a task outside of their gifting and sees if they not only take the ball but make sure they score for the team. (Follow-through can be scored here too! Do they get the job done? With Excellence?)

C. Self-Leadership: This builds on self-motivation. Do they understand that Leaders develop daily and not in a day, and do THEY (not you) initiate study and proactively schedule time to invest in themselves? Do they read and talk about what they are learning to be better? Are they Teachable? Can they take advise without having to defend themselves?

D. People Skills: Do they genuinely care about other people and effectively show and/or communicate that to them? Most importantly their team and/or coworkers. Many people I have coached have put created the feeling in others that they were cold and did not care. When I bring it up to the leader I often times find that it is not true, they really do love and care about their team, BUT that doesn't cut it! If your too busy to care then you are too busy! We are in the people business! Walk slowly through the crowd, and care MORE about each individual on your team than you do about their work getting done.

E. Delegation: Can they effectively assign work, objectives, or most importantly people to someone based on that persons gifts and skills? Do they Follow-up with them on a regular basis, to see how they are doing and offer support and guidance? Delegation + Follow-up = Multiplication whereas Delegation - follow-up = Division! Creative, outgoing types have to work hard at follow-up otherwise they are DUMPING not delegating.

F. Time/Task/Money Management: Can they be a good manager over the resources that have been entrusted to them? Can they organize their day to get stuff done? Are they always stressed out because they forget appointments, deadlines, or that there is actually the same amount of traffic on the same route they travel to the same place every day? Manage your life or it will manage you! Effective leaders are proactive with their lives not reactive.

Print multiple copies of this and write the name of each of your team member on top of each copy. Then score each of them in these 6 areas using a 1-10 scale. 1 = no evidence of skill 5 = Average level of a skill 10 = Mastery of a skill. Total possible score is 60 pts. If an individual scores 30 or below they fall into the DEVELOPING LEADER Category talked about in Point #2. If they score 31-45 they fall into the EMERGING LEADER category talked about in point number #2. If they score 45-60 they fall into the DEVELOPED LEADER CATEGORY talked about in point number 2.

I encourage you to score your team members as a business consultant, not their mentor, coach, friend, etc. Also, DO NOT consider their age or background when scoring them, be objective! Also, since good leaders almost always lead by example, have your overseer score you, so that your team is more open to the results when you share with them. You should then follow-up with a one on one meeting and share your thoughts with them and ask them what they think. If they are not open to it refer them to letter C! If they are still not open to it, create a plan to move them out, otherwise they will hold you back.

3 LIFE-STAGES OF A LEADER

(Working Backwards)

3. The Developed Leader: This person thoroughly understands not only what needs to be done but how to best position resources to maximize not only their own potential, but also that of there team.

70% of their time should be spent on there greatest 3 strengths and/or gifts. They understand that to make the biggest impact they have to spend the majority of their time on what they are good at. They need to be encouraged to spend time developing and honing their gifts.

20% of their time should be managing their weaknesses. This time should including meeting with key team members and delegating tasks, objectives, or people to other team members based on that team members strengths, and yes that which is delegated should consist of much of said leader's weaknesses.

10% of their time should be focused on Self-leadership. Meeting with Mentors, reading books, and attending conferences that challenge them and create intentional growth in the leader. They should create and manage their own growth plan. They thoroughly understand that even though they may be called a DEVELOPED LEADER, a leader is never fully developed, and they daily prove this out.

2. The Emerging Leader: This person is in transition between developing and developed and therefore an intermediate step in how they spend their time should be in operation. They understand and are developing the skills a leader must need, but they are not at a level yet where they need very little supervision.

45% of there time should be spent on what they believe are their top 3 strengths and or gifts. They may find out during this stage that, what they thought was their gift, really is not. Leaders can "False-test" and often times find out later that what they thought they were good at, is really not the case. They need lots of objective feedback on their perceived strengths and weaknesses. MAybe they really are a good communicator but thought they were not because they are nervous due to lack of experience?

45% of there time should be spend on managing their weaknesses and honing the skills every leader MUST have. Get that score up, so later in life you will be an amazing leader.

10% of their time should be focused on self leadership. Meeting with Mentors, reading books, and attending conferences that challenge them and create intentional growth in the leader. They have developed their own growth plan but still need to be held accountable, and time to time need their coach to assign readings, teachings, or sessions that will sharpen those skills that every leader MUST have!

1. The Developing leader: They have the raw materials, but they need skilled leaders to help them craft their lives into something that will leave a lasting impact and maximize every ounce of their potential. You have probably already identified their perceived strengths or gifts otherwise you would not have hired them. If strengths are unsure, then start them with the list of skills and see what emerges over time. This not only lets you see what their gifts are, but it also develops character. We develop character by doing the things no one wants to do when no one is looking (or at least we think they are not looking, meanwhile you are!)

70% of their time should be spent on managing the responsibilities given to them by their overseer, and becoming more effective at getting them done by developing the SKILLS EVERY LEADER MUST HAVE.

20% of their time should be spent on discovering their possible areas of strength or gifts and trying them out when opportunities present themselves. Great coaches look for opportunities in practice or exhibition games to try out the new kid! Then Give them feedback, and give them another shot. They need a safe place to fail, over and over, so they can grow without the pressure that they will someday have.

10% of their time? You guessed it! Self-Leadership. Teach them from the beginning that this is VERY important. Developing leaders need to have a growth plan made for them and regularly scheduled meetings to make sure that they are following their plan and developing.

This was just what I came up with on a Sunday afternoon during some milk and cookies. Feel free to edit it how you see fit and as always call with questions. Also, please give me your feedback so I can be better.

Thanks for being a great Father-in-law, and a DEVELOPED LEADER that is making an impact that will echo for eternity.

love,

david